Express' Greg Barber recaps the performances of the Top Four on "American Idol."

THE THEME OF TUESDAY NIGHT is, on a number of levels, math. Which isn't my strong suit. In fact, even though I kicked booty to the 15th power at Algebra 2: Electric Boogaloo, I haven't been much of a math fan since Ms. Shelton made me want to lobotomize myself with a graphin' calculator in the 12th grade.

But just as Hillary Clinton is confronting some disconcerting math after presidential primary contests in Indiana and North Carolina — seriously, we're going to have an American Idol before we have a Democratic presidential candidate. That's wild — so, too, are Syesha Mercado and Jason Castro likely weighing their chances of survival on "American Idol."

Syesha's landed near the bottom of the "Idol" pack a record-tying five times. Jason's performances have been flagging in recent weeks. And both of them have the misfortune of not being named David, which seems to be the key to success on this season.

But before minute one had ticked to a close in Tuesday's episode, Seacrest revealed an intriguing bit of trivia: Three of the remaining four contestants have racked up first-place finishes in weekly votes.

Unless the "Idol" math has fluctuated as wildly as fan support for Miley Cyrus, it's likely Syesha never made it to the front of the pack. So that means that Jason has. But when? And what does that mean for Syesha? Will she survive the week? And the Davids — are they not as dominant as we'd think?

I'll get the graphin' calculator. There's a sine curve in this somewhere.

The night's songs come from the vaults of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, an edifice which, aside from hosting a funky concert each year and collecting more rock memorabilia than a bevy of Hard Rock Cafes, has ensured that some wild-haired rocker will, for years to come, pop a menacing sneer and growl "'Ello, Cleveland!"

After a video tribute to how super keen that rock music is, with many a gratuitous shot of said museum, it's time for the contestants to perform. They'll have two songs each.

DAVID COOK, PART 1
His first song is "Hungry Like the Wolf" by Duran Duran. I can barely contain my excitement. In fact, totally despite myself, I cackled like that cartoon bird who's cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.

I'm not a proud man.

But, c'mon, David Cook and one of the premiere songs of the '80s? It's a match made in the totally rad, pegged-jeans, neon orange section of heaven, right?

It's not quite as good as I'd hoped.

His rambunctious punk-rock-ish take on it is listenable. But I was hoping there'd be more of a twist to it — especially since he promised in his intro interview that he'd stand the song on its head. Instead, he seemed to just tilt it slightly askew.

And he really fumbles the lyrics. I mean, I always mumble through them, too, but I'm singing in my car with the windows rolled up and he's on national television being beamed into millions of living rooms. How 'bout some flashcards? (Watch here.)

"That was an OK choice and it was a solid performance," Randy says. "That was just OK for you."

"I think your 'Hungry Like the Wolf,' has left me with a big appetite, David Cook," Paula says creepily to much applause.

"David, I thought it was good," Simon says. "I know where Randy's coming from because it was a little bit copycat. ... Is it good enough, at the moment, to probably get through to next week? Yes."

SYESHA MERCADO, Part 1
Syesha joins Seacrest in the Coke Corner, where she gushes about the upcoming Idols Live tour, in which she and her cohorts come to a city near you. (In Washington, D.C., that's Aug. 14 at the Verizon Center. Apparently this li'l blog also has pockets of readers in Dallas, where the Idolites will play American Airlines Center on Aug. 25, and Los Angeles, where they'll hit the Staples Center on July 7.)

Her first song is "Proud Mary" by Tina Turner. A bold choice, since it's the marquee song for one of the most celebrated talents in rock.

And she brings. The. Freakin'. House. Down.

It's her best performance by a longshot. She exudes a sexiness that's at turns playful and aggressive, but at all points brilliant. She radiates stardom during this set. It's an amazing show of vocal aplomb and charisma that even Ms. Turner herself would likely salute. Absolutely incandescent. (Watch here.)

"I'm laughing because what a difference a couple of weeks make," Randy says. "This is the third week in a row that Syesha has showed up and she's in the zone. Nice going."

"You look like a star," Paula says. "In your package, you said you just looked in the mirror and you said, 'I'm just gonna do it.' When you feel the fear and you do it anyway, magic happens — and you've made that happen."

"Syesha, I'm sorry to put a slight damper on things," Simon says to a round of preemptive boos, "because, for me, I just thought it was a bad, shrieky version — a bad impersonation of Tina Turner."

I'm of two minds about this. Either Simon was trying to blast a big enough hole in the S.S. Syesha to ensure her demise, or, crafty little Brit that he is, perhaps he was employing a little "Idol" reverse psychology and was doing the best he could to keep Syesha in the game by riling up her fans.

He couldn't possibly have found that performance shrieky. Or to be a bad impersonation. It just wasn't either of the two. He's definitely up to something.

I have no doubt this will be the source of many a post in comments today. And remember that my Idol Chatter Live chat is at 11 a.m. I'll be ready to believe you.

JASON CASTRO, Part 1
I'll apologize in advance to any Jason fans for this statement, but this dude really, seriously comes off like he's dumb as a post in his intro interviews. Including his first one of the night, during which he sputters through this: "So this week is the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. And, um, there was a few songs on the list that I knew. And, uh, so I'm singing one that I've known for a while, that I like to sing. ... It's a song by Bob Marley. Go figure."

Yeah.

He sings, "I Shot the Sheriff," which will likely leave one of this blog's regular commenters ducking under his desk. Don't worry. I'm betting Jason's aim is usually a leeeeeetle off.

He's better than he's been in weeks, but he's still not great. His posturing is really strange. Unlike normal, understated Jason, he makes screwy faces and waves around his arms and legs like he's afflicted with a disease that makes him think his wrists and ankles have been replaced with helium-filled balloons. (Watch here.)

The vocals are way too showy for a guy without much to show. And while it seems as if he actually put some effort into this performance, it still wasn't any better than something I could hear at Eastern Market on any given weekend. In fact, I think it's worse.

"Ah, man, listen, duuuuude," Randy says. "For me, that was a really karaoke Bob Mah— I mean, I don't even. ... There was nothing special about it, and at this point you guys have to show that you deserve to be in the top — in the finals now. It's not about just doing a song that's good enough to just have some fun."

"On a positive note, I've never seen you perform to the audience as you did," Paula says. But then she lowers the boom — for Paula, anyway: "I wasn't crazy about the performance or the song, actually. But, you know, you're so real, you're so genuine, your artistry always shines through ... you've won me over just for that."

"Jason, stand back," Simon says. "That was utterly atrocious. Sorry, that is a song you do not touch. The arrangement was atrocious. The performing and the singing was as bad as I've ever heard. This was like, honestly, a first-round audition massacre. I don't know what you're thinking."

"I was thinking, 'Bob Marley! Yeah!'" Jason says.

Gimme a D! Gimme a U! Gimme an H!

Randy and Simon continue to deliver body blows until Paula cuts them off. Then, Seacrest asks Paula to give Jason advice for his next song — and he's got 10 minutes to take it to heart! — but Simon jumps in first, saying "I'll give you some advice: don't do Bob Marley."

"Jason. You're good," she says. Like a puppy. Jason mouths "Vote! Vote!" as his phone numbers are read.

This thumping by the judges throws the entire machine into overdrive. Jason's fans will be hitting the phone lines en masse. Syesha's will, too. Could this — dare I say? — mean trouble for the as-yet-untouchable Davids?

DAVID ARCHULETA, Part 1
Li'l David's singing "Stand by Me" by Ben E. King, which seems like it's just the kind of song Li'l David would enjoy. "I always sing it in my room. To myself. To my dog or something."

In that case, I wonder if it ever becomes "Fetch by Me." Or "Drool by Me."

Wow. He takes a singerly song and makes it even singerlyier (let's see if that makes it through editing [I'm down with making up words to express feelings. In fact, I often make up words ... and other things ... during therapy. -Ed.]) by turning the end of the tune into a series of highly successful runs.

He's playing entirely to his audience now. He uses the final minute to show his range, even adding his own line, "And all you beyouuuuuuutiful girls," without explaining exactly what he wants with all those beautiful girls. (To trade banana bread recipes, maybe?)

No doubt he's got a hell of a voice. No new trails are blazed here, but his core audience probably loves him all the more for what he's done. (Watch here.)

Put Randy on that list.

"What I'm so happy about sitting here right now: There's four of you left. At least there's one guy that hits the stage, every time he hits the stage, trying to win the whole thing," Randy exclaims. "He brought the hot, mad vocals, Paula. ... That was hot."

"You're taking in everything we're saying, good and bad, and throwing out what you don't need, and you're seasoned already," Paula says.

"The truth is, David, you could have whistled that song and it would have sounded better than that last song," Simon says. "I thought you struggled a little bit at the end of it. ... But, look, in the grand scheme of things, I'm going to call that as the best performance so far.

Seacrest brings up a point I've wondered about for weeks. "I always feel like you're about to lose your breath and pass out while they're talking to you. What's going through their mind when you're listening to their critique?"

"I don't know, their faces scare me!" David says breathlessly. "I have no idea what they're going to say."

Confusion leads to apoplexy? Interesting. Hope his physics teacher knows CPR.

DAVID COOK, Part 2
In the Coke Corner, David engages in a little self-critique: "The last song, the judges were right on. I could have done way more with that song."

His second choice is "Baba O'Reilly" by The Who, which he rightly describes as "one of those iconic rock songs" that he hopes to spin in his own way.

This time, he does.

A smooth, mellow start opens up into a blistering second half, performing The Who's anthem for teen disaffection in the manner to which we've become accustomed. He seems much more at home in this song, and the arrangement suits him much better this time.

He still seems a little off his game, though. Not great timing for that. (Watch here.)

"I don't know, there's something different going on with you tonight," Randy says. "But that's more like the David Cook that I've grown to love right there."

"I just want more!" Paula says. "I'm really humbled to sit here and watch your soul. Thanks for sharing with everybody."

If I were David, I totally would have checked my fly right then. But he's been on TV more often than I have.

"Welcome back, David Cook," Simon says.

SYESHA MERCADO, Part 2
Her second song is "A Change Is Gonna Come" by Sam Cooke. The heft of the vocals in her rendition of this song could power Des Moines for a week. Much like Li'l David's first song, Syesha packed this tune with a series of runs and then added a final note so strongly punched that I thought it might turn her larynx inside out.

It was a smidge too much, I think. But if Syesha was trying to prove she could smoke the competition in a challenge of sheer vocal intensity, then mission accomplished. I liked her first song better, though. (Watch here.)

"For me, the first song, I loved. This one I did not love as much," Randy says. "[It] felt all disconnected for me trying to be something it wasn't."

Paula gives her a standing ovation. "You've turned this into a superstar performance for me," a visibly teary Paula tells a now-teary-herself Syesha. "Singing the song 'A Change Is Gonna Come' — you have changed. You are magnificent. And you have come. Welcome to your dream, Syesha. This is it for you."

Syesha's openly weeping now.

"Syesha, I have to be fair," Simon says. "And I have to agree with Paula. ... I think Randy, with all due respect, got that completely and utterly wrong. I thought you sang that really, really well."

"It's OK," a sobbing Syesha says. "It meant a lot to me."

She talks broadly — and suddenly tearlessly ... woah — about the song's connection to the Civil Rights movement, but that quickly devolves into a bantering session ribbing Randy for making Syesha cry. Which he didn't. But whatever.

Television rarely delivers moments of genuine emotion. That was one. Let's all step back for a moment and admire that for what it was.

JASON CASTRO, Part 2
His next song is Bob Dylan's "Mr. Tambourine Man," which is a song I personally love and one that I now fear will be yet another song I adore that's brutally mangled by an Idolite. "Here Comes the Sun" is still in traction and "I'm a Believer" can't remember its kids' names yet. I steel myself up.

He starts off OK, and I think that maybe he'll pull this eh eh hum heh hum he heh heh hum hum humum hum.

That sounded pretty bad didn't it? But not as bad as FORGETTING THE LYRICS TO A BOB DYLAN SONG ON NATIONAL TELEVISION.

Ahem.

I mean, there's forgetting words, then there's what Jason does. And it's a shame, too, because the performance isn't necessarily bad otherwise. Yeah, I'm tired of his voice and his I-don't-know-what-I'm-singing- but-look-into-my-sparkly-eyes lack of inflection, but the jingle-jangle style of rock that this song pioneered is his whole stock and trade. If he didn't manage to skewer it right through the heart, he might have done all right. (Watch here.)

Can this kid please finally be toast? How many times does he have to prove he doesn't belong in the finals to finally get booted from this show?

At least Carly Smithson, who's in the crowd tonight, is standing and clapping. As are many of his fans, to be fair. But they're clearly clapping for the guy and not the performance.

Randy employs a trick used by many a parent: "What do you think your punishment should be?" That is, until they realized most kids aren't very good at punishing themselves.

"So tell me, man, how did you think that was?" Randy says.

"Well, I lost some lines in there, that's kind of bad," Jason says.

"Jason's not in the zone tonight, I don't know what's going on," Randy says.

"Yes, you are!" screams a shrill female voice. Hear that, shouting fan? That's you. You're shrill. Lace that up and wear it around town.

"You know what, Jason? You know, it is what it is," Paula says. "Obviously, it didn't blow us away, but you blow me away."

"Jason, I'd pack your suitcase," Simon says.

If you don't think the Castro fans are poised with a phone in each hand and some ready to dial with their feet as well, you're crazy.

DAVID ARCHULETA, Part 2
As long as he doesn't douse the audience in battery acid, Li'l David can't do much worse than his predecessor.

He doesn't. Uh, meaning he does neither the battery acid thing nor the doing worse thing. To be specific.

He sings "Love Me Tender" by Elvis with an intensity that belies his years. It's a bit unfair of me to say, but I got the slightest twinge of a feeling that at his tender age he doesn't really know a feeling as deep as the one described in the song. Actually, I honestly, for the briefest moment, looked at his mouth and wondered if he'd lost one of his baby teeth between last episode and this one, even though that makes no sense since he's in his late teens. But, hey, I like to share these things. I feel like we're far enough along in our relationship for that, aren't we?

In any case, it's a brilliant performance. It's vintage Li'l David, and we've heard enough of it to know that if you like it, you'll like it; if you don't, you won't. But enough people like it that I think he's surely going to remain in the competition after this week. (Watch here.)

"Another great performance for you," Randy says. "I like how you were so tender and you caressed each word. Dude, you've got it going on right now. The hot vocals of the night right there."

"That was one of my favorite performances from you," Paula says. "I felt your heart [ew.], it was fantastic [double ew.] and very beautiful."

"David, you didn't beat the competition tonight," Simon says, "you crushed the competition."

He definitely did well. But I'm not so sure about the "crushed" thing.

FEARLESS PICKS
What a mind-blowing little night we've had. I thought Li'l David was indeed at the top of his game, but he was nearly matched by the range and intensity of Syesha, who showed that five trips to the bottom of the pack did nothing but sharpen her skills. She surely outperformed Jason Castro and even David Cook, who appeared to be a shadow of his usual self, even during his much-improved second performance.

Jason's voters will be out in force, but I think this episode will prod everyone's fan base into action, so any logic you'd apply to the voting portion of our little game has gone totally out the window.

How will it all shake out? I have no clue. But here's an educated guess: Li'l David is staying put. David C. might get a scare, but I don't think he'll be voted off. Probably. I think he has more of a chance of being voted off after this episode, though, than he has at any other point in this competition.

Syesha's clearly in danger, but it's my hope that justice will prevail and she'll be given a chance to advance, since she's clearly, clearly earned it. I think Jason, by rights, should be sent packing. After performing abysmally twice in a row, he seemed to stand there and snicker like a cheap Jeff Spicoli knockoff. He's done. If it wasn't for an army of teenage gals who think he's dreamy, he'd have been gone weeks ago.

» COMING UP: Who will go? Who will survive? I'll address that very topic during this week's edition of Idol Chatter Live, to which you can graciously add your two cents at 11 a.m. today at readexpress.com/idol. That address is where you can find Thursday morning's recap as well, which'll be posted after we find out who makes the Top Three.

Until then, was your head spinning as much as mine was after this episode? What did you think of the performances? Of the contestants' chances? Let your voice be heard below in our comments section.

Photos courtesy Fox

Posted by Greg Barber at 6:26 AM on May 7, 2008
Tagged in Entertainment , Idol Chatter , Television , Top Columns